Life Manifestations

I’ve been thinking about responsibility a lot lately and exactly what that means. I’ve always felt that I’m a pretty responsible person. I don’t do too many stupid things. I don’t bury my head in the sand and pretend that I can’t do anything about things. I work pretty hard to help take care of my family. Growing up, I was the one who did my homework, and did as much as possible of my homework before it was assigned. If I knew we were going to have to write out the bold words and definitions, I worked on them several weeks at a time so that they would be ready when they were assigned. Geeky, I know.

Anyway, I feel a strong sense of responsibility to help those who are less fortunate. I’m not always good at it, because it’s easy to feel that one person can’t make a difference. For instance, hunger. There are a lot of people starving and things can feel hopeless sometimes, but there are always people out there helping where they can. One thing we’ve done as a family is to sponsor a family through http://www.openhearts.org It’s a small thing, but for that one family, I’m sure it’s huge. It’s good to know there are small ways to make a difference in the world.

I also read and educate myself a lot. I read about struggles women go through in other parts of the world. It’s easy to get stuck in a pattern of feeling sorry for yourself when things aren’t going your way. Finding ways to help someone else helps to lift me out of the rut I fall into from time to time. It isn’t just a way to feel better though, it’s a responsibility. I wash the dishes when they need it, I wash my clothes when they need it, and in the same way, I should help someone out when it’s needed. I try to keep that at the front of my mind as I go through life.

Sometimes, it’s nice to have a clean slate. I changed the layout of my blog and I’ve deleted previous posts. I know in general deleting everything isn’t a good idea, but it helps me to do so once in a while.

Sometimes, I’m tempted to throw out all of my writing but I’ve never managed to do so. It would seem too much like throwing out pieces of myself and there’s part of me that fears my best years are past and I would throw away the record of those years. Still, there is catharsis in starting over.

I can go in any direction I want to. I can travel anywhere I want to travel. I can write anything I want to and it doesn’t seem as though it doesn’t fit with my theme, because I don’t have one set yet. There’s something about that that makes me feel free.